Jump to content

Upset Neighbor parked his truck in my driveway.


Recommended Posts

After a hard days work I can see the guys point.

He wants in his driveway for a house he pays for.

Why does everyone make it look like he is the problem?

We are not trying to make it look like he is the problem. I totally understand where he is coming from. His house might be his refuge, but so is mine. So he does not like the traffic and wants to get into his drive. I offered several suggestions such as placing cones on each side of his driveway etc.... He didn't like any idea I came up with. That is the main thing. He wants to complain, but when I come up with ideas and offer to pay for any expense, it is not good enough. How can he complain if he won't let me do the proper measures to correct the situation?

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Replies 70
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

I agree. Doing these displays is kind of like having 20-30 holiday parties for the month of December ... and from a neighbor perspective, it's not all positive.

But that said, most people realize that they are part of something special at the same time. The net good (for most) often partially compensates for the hassles they incur as your neighbors. But some people (and more than ever in todays narcissistic society) just think about #1 ... and in their mind, your giving unto others doesn't make any sense ... it's not helpful to them, so why do it?

It would be very clever if you found out that this fella was suffering from some awful disease ... and then announced that a percentage of your donations were to help find a cure ... or to help him pay medicals bills. Thats would be a strange turn of events, I bet you. The other thing would be to try and get him involved somehow. If you found out he was a skilled woodworker and then asked him to help build you a sign (for example) ... then he'd catch the fever in a hurry.

But to your last post, you can't deal reasonably with unreasonable demands. Its fair that he wants a place to park and his privacy at home ... but really he's acting childish and not being reasonable when you offered reasonable help and/or ideas to improve his situation. You have done all you can do, most likely.

You don't have to give up your own happiness for his. I have such a neighbor ... and some thrive on making OTHERS happy, while others blame the world for their own problems and don't take help when offered it. It's self-destructive and probably the result of childhood and/or lifetime issues that could take a lifetime or more to fix in professional hands.

Edited by taybrynn
Link to post
Share on other sites

We are not trying to make it look like he is the problem. I totally understand where he is coming from. His house might be his refuge, but so is mine. So he does not like the traffic and wants to get into his drive. I offered several suggestions such as placing cones on each side of his driveway etc.... He didn't like any idea I came up with. That is the main thing. He wants to complain, but when I come up with ideas and offer to pay for any expense, it is not good enough. How can he complain if he won't let me do the proper measures to correct the situation?

Just in case he might gonna cause a problem contact the police by yourself. You can tell them what you did and what you offered him to do. Ask them for advice and go on with your display and make sure you will have fun.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Perhaps a solution is to buy and put out cones for your house and neighbors' driveways on both sides of you as well as the houses across the street. that's 6 houses total. That way he does not need to feel like the "oddball" or bad guy. Also, perhaps some signs along the road telling people to be courteous and to allow people to drive past and not to block driveways.

One thing I asked about (here) before was why people do not put long pauses in between the songs. If there is a minute with no activity, some people might leave. Also, why not repeat the same song a few times in a row before switching. People will leave sooner if it is the same thing over and over. And if they want to see another song, they can come back later. This will help speed up the traffic flow. (Just some thoughts.)

I put a motion sensor on my animated scene so it is not on all the time and would require the persons to come down the driveway (we're down in the woods) for anything to start. And 4 minutes later, unless someone passes that sensor again, show's over. 12 minutes seemed too long... The real lights are below the horizon to the side of the house along the railroad so very little of it shows from up at the road. Of course, I'm leaving it all off except the weekends until Christmas week, unless someone comes down to see them (VERY unlikely.)

Link to post
Share on other sites

I was going to say, “offer to connect his house up to your’s”, but I held back.:P

The neighbor behind me and the owners of the Apt building next to me have both offered me extra "amps" if I need them next year.

Plus the older woman behind me who lost her husband 3 years ago says if I run out of room her front yard looks bare next to mine. I'm welcome to fix that.

The street I live on was known as "Christmas Card Lane" in the sixties. If you did not put up a 4' x 8' "Christmas Card" in the front yard, you got a talking to. If you were unable to do so, somebody did it for you. Needless to say there were always many other decorations.

The lady behind me says she only heard one minor complaint, and when she told that person the Christmas Card story he said "I guess I better just shut up then"

Edited by BMcGeeny
Link to post
Share on other sites

You should offer to hook his house up next year to your commputer. Have him buy a couple of 1602's and a wireless transmitter and BAMM, he's your new best friend. I have 2 other house on my street hooked up via wireless to my computer. Good luck!!!!!!

Dido EH

I was going to ask you if I get a wireless can run off of your....then the funny thing IS I saw that you are in the same town so MAYBE I can..lol...in Indian River Estate

Link to post
Share on other sites

You should offer to hook his house up next year to your commputer. Have him buy a couple of 1602's and a wireless transmitter and BAMM, he's your new best friend. I have 2 other house on my street hooked up via wireless to my computer. Good luck!!!!!!

Dido EH

I wish it were only that easy. This neighbor just doesn't want the traffic. He just does want to bring all these people into our neighborhood. O, but maybe I could get my neighbor beside me to animate? LOL Have a good one.

Matt

Link to post
Share on other sites

Its a small world 3866! However I think they only transmit 1000 ft or so LOL. I live in River Hammock. Have relatives on Sunset Ave in IRE. Stop by sometime. Are you doing LOR or its equivilent?

or it equivilent...(5) GE light and sound...too dumb to work the lor maybe next year..tell relative be on the look out for my 11th annual hay ride in IRE...and I would like to stop by to start to learn this thing people talk about LOR!!!!..if you been around for awhile I was the guy west of town with 100k of lights about 7 years ago

Link to post
Share on other sites

Think that's bad. I almost lost my Mega Tree today. Someone decided to drive through my yard. This is a bad intersection and this happens now and again. They missed the street sign, the No parking sign and thank God my display. My web cam snaps a picture every 5 mins and by golly I got a picture. Not that it does me any good, but I will be watching for this car. By the time stamp this looks to have happened at 11:30 AM. Tore up some sod, but other than that no major damage. Still think they should have left a note as we were not home at the time. Merry Christmas!

Link to post
Share on other sites

Think that's bad. I almost lost my Mega Tree today. Someone decided to drive through my yard. This is a bad intersection and this happens now and again. They missed the street sign, the No parking sign and thank God my display. My web cam snaps a picture every 5 mins and by golly I got a picture. Not that it does me any good, but I will be watching for this car. By the time stamp this looks to have happened at 11:30 AM. Tore up some sod, but other than that no major damage. Still think they should have left a note as we were not home at the time. Merry Christmas!

Unbelievably close call. That happens down here in Florida about this time of year with the influx of folks running from the cold weather. Either impatient people or those that should probably have someone else drive. Glad your hard work was saved.

Link to post
Share on other sites

I read threads like this and my emotion runs the gamut. Tongue-in-cheek responses make us feel better about it. Some of them describe how we'd really like to get away with dealing with those neighbors who aren't like us and don't share in how we celebrate our beliefs. But we all know that the right thing to do is to find a common ground, as they own their home too... and if we're offending them with our Blinky Flashy... their response is reactionary. In their eyes we served the first volley with our display and the behavior of those who view them. We need to face the fact that we are responsible for the cars that stop to see our display. Mr. Carson Williams himself can attest to that. After his November 2005 appearance on the Today Show there were car accidents in front of his house. Then the lights went dark. That's more scary to me than anything. I avoid media coverage like the plague because of it.

I just got a PM from a close friend in DC who's display is one of the most beautiful things I've seen in a long time. He has a neighbor who opposes his display. In preparation for the 2008 Holiday season they skirted their property with orange construction fence. He stated that he chose to remove the music from his display to deal with the neighbor issues. There is no higher road that anyone I know could have taken. Consider that for a second. Think of some of the most wonderful displays you've seen in this hobby, their authors willing to removed the musical synchronization to find a common ground with their neighbors.

No matter how upset you are with a neighbor who doesn't see the beauty of your hard work, they still have rights. By trying to find a way to make them see things our way, we're doing the same thing to them they are doing to us. The gentleman who started this thread has an edge that many folks with neighbor relation problems don't. His neighbor is at least willing to talk to him. There are some who's neighbors are so angry about the lights and traffic that they don't even speak, ever. The thought of that makes me very sad.

Tim Fischer once told a story about his neighbor. It made me so sad that I went across the street and hand wrapped 30 sets of multi lights around my neighbor's dogwood tree, because I felt so fortunate to live on a street where this problem doesn't exist. It was my way of saying thank you to my neighbors, and hoping good thoughts for Tim and his family.

It's easy to pretend I would know what to do if I had neighbor issues. But I know for sure that one thing would happen. The good lord himself wouldn't want me to force my blinking lights down the throat of someone who doesn't like them. So I'd probably offer to limit the time... and find as many things as I could to make it better for them. Who knows, maybe the guy who suggested you get him involved was right. He might even become a worthy adversary. Take a look at the videos of Marty Slack's neighbors. Many of them would be considered hugh displays across most of the country.

IMHO, try to see the lights from their perspective. You might be surprised what you see in yourself.

Jeff

PS Tounge-in-cheek: I have a short fuse and quite a temper some times. I wonder how many times I would threaten to move before they knew I was just another loud mouth?!?

Link to post
Share on other sites

2 more cents coming... I think reply 44 and 45 were right on... send the guy a gift certificate and make him feel special. While reading your complaint, he reminded me of my dad. I love my dad so much but he had a terrible childhood, abused badly... and he had respect issues. But inside he was a teddy bear. Almost sounds like some real nice treatment and he'll come to tolerate your display without so much anger. You never know where people are coming from. I really liked the idea of offering him a special place to park if he needs it some night. :)

I also thought the idea of decorating his truck while it was parked there was hilarious! :D

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • 2 weeks later...

If he were my neighbor I'd send him a tin of fresh baked goods and a Christmas card that read "Thanks for being a great neighbor, I know my light show causes all my neighbors some inconvenience and we sure do appreciate your tolerance and support of the Christmas spirit."

I don't have this problem because my neighbors spend most of their time trying to out do me. I guess they are old school "If you can't beat them, join them."

Link to post
Share on other sites

Great suggestions.

I feel blessed thus far ... one neighbor who I was most worried about has said nothing ... which is beyond expectations in a good way.

My other neighbor has complained I don't run the lights enough or late enough ... and asks for me to run them sometimes ... so thats been great.

And the other folks are all very complementary about the display ... so thats great.

I've had a lot of thanks from neighbors and folks in my subdivision for doing it ... that is all really nice and better than I could have hoped for.

I am also happy that traffic has been light thus far, so no serious inconveniences yet, but I do live out in an very remote spot ... so thats probably why ... combined with my no-advertise policy.

THe original thread poster here has done everything anyone could reasonably asked (and then some) ... an example to be commended I think. It is people like him and other that set the bar of excellence high for the rest of us to also strive for.

Link to post
Share on other sites

You probably won't ever really please these folks. As far as the truck in your drive I would have given him 10 minutes to get it out then call the police. Some dump stuff down our friends light show and burned it out.

They had been having repeated trouble with some folks and tried everything to get along but now luck then the vandalism.

There are just some who are never happy unless they have something to make them selves miserable over.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.


×
×
  • Create New...